Body positivity, beauty without templates and the path to your own uniqueness
Many teenagers are unhappy with their bodies. They dream of changing him, they don’t feel confident, they are stressed. We recently released the book “You Are More Beautiful Than You Think” – about how to deal with it. And they decided to discuss the ideas of body positive with a person who overcame an eating disorder. Today Tusya is a blogger with a million subscribers, the author of a popular YouTube channel and a simple girl who was able to accept and love herself.
– The topic of body positive sounds more and more often today, thanks to you as well. Why, in your opinion, is it gaining popularity, what is body positive for you?
– Bodypositive is a kind attitude towards yourself and your body, acceptance of it as it is. Body positivity is freedom: by stopping to fixate on how we look, we begin to live for real. I am glad that more and more people share the idea of body positive. Although it is still difficult for many to give up the idea that they do not need to drive a framework into themselves (so much effort has been invested in meeting other people’s ideas).
“Real life, emotions, feelings, they are here and now.” – A source
I think people take the side of body positive precisely because of freedom. Now freedom is appreciated in everything: in movement, communication (you can talk with anyone and about anything). The freedom to be in your body and not take a steam bath in order to constantly change it also begins to be important. Also, girls are becoming more and more independent, they get bored that they should be liked by someone, correspond to something. When the main goal in life is not a successful marriage, you can relax and live in pleasure, do what you like, look like you like, not men.
– You recently released a video and the #somnoyvsetak tag. What thoughts and questions did you want to awaken in those who watch the video?
– This tag is about the fact that every body is correct and beautiful. There are no bodies to “work on” that need to be improved or changed. I want all the girls, before doing something with themselves, to think about whether they need it. Or they strive to please someone, to be like someone, to bring their bodies in line with the “standards of beauty.”
Shooting. – A source
– How to accept and love your body? Open up your chips.
– When I was sick with anorexia and was already recovering, I realized that the body is a very intelligent creature, it wants to live and wants to help you live, no matter how you mock it. Then I realized that this is MY body, I have one, there will be no other. This is probably the most important feature. Just think that your body is a part of you that deserves love, not endless criticism. Try to listen to him. What does it want? Water? Stretch? Sleep? No need to ignore its signals, it knows well what it needs. And more often you look at yourself in the mirror, not looking for what is ugly, but noticing what you like about yourself. Over time, there will be more such parts of the body.
– How to protect yourself from the influence of advertising, social networks, the Internet and stereotyped ideas about beauty?
– In the modern world it is very difficult, of course. First of all, it is better to unsubscribe from accounts and pages in social networks that broadcast a body image that is far from natural. Just not looking always helps. Well, and still think. Track intrusion, read articles, educate and critique everything.
– Tell parents how to recognize an eating disorder in their child, what to say so as not to alienate him, how to help?
– This is a very difficult question, I have never been in the place of my parents, thank God. Probably, in order to notice this in time, you need to be friends with the child. Because an eating disorder is a cunning beast, anorexic and bulimic women understand that something is wrong with them, hide it, lie, pretend that everything is in order. But if you notice that after each meal the child goes to the toilet or is constantly “not hungry” and says that he ate at school or with a friend, then this is a reason to think.
There are many tips, exercises, facts in this book.
– It is not always easy for teenagers to understand their dreams, discover their strengths, choose a path for development. How to hear yourself?
– It is important to distinguish whether these are your desires or whether they are imposed by society, parents, friends, teachers, and so on. Fortunately, I don’t have any particular problems with understanding my desires and goals. There were no disagreements with my parents either. They always gave me the right to choose, treated me like an adult, and respected my decisions. I think that’s why it’s pretty easy for me to define my desires and fulfill them.
I advise everyone to constantly listen to themselves: how do I feel when I do this? Why am I sad / dreary / bored? Or, on the contrary, what gives me inspiration, at the thought of what I “light up”? The answers are in ourselves.
– On Instagram, you talk about the books you read. Share topics, issues and authors that are of interest to you right now?
– The theme of self-love, self-acceptance, the theme of beauty standards is very relevant for me. A very powerful book that hits right to the point and reveals hard-hitting facts about our society – “The Myth of Beauty” by Naomi Wolf. I would like everyone to read it. Perhaps she would clarify for many what beauty standards are and how they prevent us from living.
– What are 3 books about self-development in your personal TOP and why?
1. “How to Love Yourself, or a Mom for the Inner Child” by Naomi Rain. This is a book about psychology. I believe that no amount of self-development books will help if you have mental health problems. Therefore, this book on subpersonalities is the most important of all books on self-development. Meeting the Inner Child gives a lot of joy, strength and support. When he is heard, ideas, pleasure from life, energy and inspiration come.
2. “Whole Life” by Jack Canfield. Everyone knows that one of the main rules of a happy life is having the right priorities. The main reason most people are not doing well is lack of focus. The authors of the book offer techniques that will help you focus on the main thing and learn how to cut off the unnecessary.
3. “My Productive Year” by Chris Bailey. There are many different rules for planning, productivity, efficiency, and Chris Bailey has tested the most famous methods for himself. In the book, these techniques are structured, each is assessed.
– How do you choose the books you will read, and which 3 do you plan to read in the near future?
– I rely on what my friends and colleagues advise. It happens that I will see other bloggers in their stories and get interested. Sometimes I just come to the bookstore, leaf through the books and choose the one I like. I plan to read “Jedi Techniques” by Maxim Dorofeev, “Content, Marketing and Rock ‘n’ Roll” by Denis Kaplunov and “Courage of a Woman” by Jack London.
Maxim Dorofeev’s book will help to save yourself from overload and to correctly prioritize
– In one of your posts you said that you love to study. What are you learning now, where do you get knowledge?
– Now I am learning and doing what I really like. And these are not traditional subjects and sciences. I am learning to dance, to control my body, to feel it. I learn to sing, breathe correctly, control my voice easily and enjoy it. I also started to learn to play the guitar, because it is interesting to try. I don’t know if I’ll like it, but it was worth a try.
– If you had the opportunity to share one idea with teenagers around the world, what words would it be?
– You are unique / unique. Love yourself, praise yourself, do not look at others, you have your own path, and everything will definitely work out.
Post cover – screenshot from video